Do men really beat their wives by accident?


#1

I have heard numerous stories about men that have beaten their wives even to death and after discussing this wahala with a friend I thought to share my two cents on the issue.

You see, I believe that domestic abuse doesn’t happen “by accident.” These things are premeditated. The violent husband might conceive his or her behaviour as a ‘loss of control’, but this same guy, unsurprisingly, would not lose control in this way with a boss or his friends. So how come his loss of control is activated when he is with is wife.

Dear ladies, before you marry someone you should keep an eye for the warning signals. Its not by how long you date him. Just learn his attitude. He may not beat you but you can surely notice the violent tendencies within.

I heard one story about a lady defending her man by saying “he beats me to bring out the best in me”. I have also heard about people that have makeup sex after such battery.

What are your opinions and what signals should a lady watch out for in a relationship?
cc @Roger @Nsikak_Effiong @oluwakemisola @sportsfreak @Banks @ChiQaH @detosho @Michael @Bimz @LizPeters @Baberjide14 @Enigma @igbokwenu @Yeye @Scinivie @Efe @Oluwarufus

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#2

One of the first signs are how he treats those that are below him. That’s quite important if he is ready to get physical with that bike man who just scratched his car, be very afraid.
Another is does he look at you as a doormat that he can trample on, sister don’t wait runaway as fast your legs can carry you.
Thirdly do your research about his former relationships and if you are hearing things like I had to let her go because she wasn’t respecting me enough, please be very wary of him and his ego.
Oh and this is very important don’t ever let him hit u a second time. Let the first one be his last. Don’t accept any apologies leave him.


#3

@Michael you have made very valid points man. I just realised the getting physical with the bike one now. On a nice day a man should be a gentleman even in situations that should provoke him.

Ladies need to be more discerning like our mothers that can easily tell a bad man from meeting him the first time.


#4

Thanks


#5

"I heard one story about a lady defending her man by saying “he beats me to bring out the best in me”.
Is the lady a drum?


#6

This is the problem many have.

A friend came to visit recently. I left her in the room and by the time I went back to attend to her, she was on the phone arguing with someone. This arguement was hot. After the call, I asked what happened and she said it was her boyfriend o. The guy dictates where she can go to and where she can’t. Imagine! All the way from Osun state, the guy does not mind his business.

We got talking about it and she said something that even made me open mouth. She said that anytime they argue, the guy will always say “don’t worry, when we get married, we will know who the husband is”. That alone is enough for me to end a relationship.

Another thing she said was that anytime she wants to send money to her mother, the guy will complain that is it from her small salary that she wants to send money to her mum. Just imagine that. And they never marry o.

Signs that their marriage is gunna be an abusive one.


Respect and Love
#7

Recipe for disaster.


#8

Ladies you’ve heard it all. Be wise. Marriage is meant to be enjoyed not endured.


#9

There are not only cases of husbands that beat their wives,some women beat up their husbands.:smiley: I’ve seen a couple that the wife looks like a 6ft body builder while the husband is slim and short :sweat_smile: that love must have been strong like koboko to bring them together :smile: though it may be laughable, I’ve seen scenarios of wives intimidating their husbands…both genders must be careful not to make a grave decision in marrying such a crude spouse.I know of a couple that wedded weeks ago,during their courtship the lady seizes her fiance’s phone at will and travels probably to monitor the ladies that calls him.when friends call the fiance’s number she’ll take the call and tell them to call his not so major line that she travelled with the phone.:joy: Also at a point she needed some provisions and groceries, the fiance delayed for about two days,maybe cos he couldn’t provide them at the moment, he later got the stuffs only to find out upon his arrival that the girl has gotten all the stock she wanted, asking her how come? she said “I was waiting for you now but someone else has bought them for me” :grinning: tell me this guy didn’t make a mistake going on with the wedding plans.


#10

And she is waiting till they get married so he can show her who the husband is??? Issoke, she still dey wait, please advice her to follow @Michael’s advice.

Please what kinda man will tell you when and what to give your own mother or family your hard earned money? Warning signals blaring loud.


#11

Hahahahaha, that woman is the husband while the man is the wife. Infact he is an accomplice in the relationship :joy: :joy:


#12

Honestly I don’t get! If you can’t give your mother out of the little you are earning now, is it now when the money is a lot you will find it easy to give to her. You are not married and he is already dictating how you spend your money. The guy is just sick.

I told her not to expect me at her wedding if she marries him out of pity, because it’s obvious this type of man will not only batter her life, but make her a house wife. He will lock her in the house when he goes out.

She said she will break up with him tomorrow. They are still together today :unamused:. I’m no longer interested :coffee: :frog:


#13

This is how ladies knowingly go into relationships and marriages with their korokoro eyes widely opened and they later come back to say Na winch they do their marriage. Mtcheww


#14

She is obviously getting some. A lot of ladies are tied down cos of the sex. Its almost as if regardless of the warning factors they have seen they just prefer to stay there cos of the fear of loneliness. Total crap!


#15

:joy:


#16

@Michael you made very solid points! Truth be told, the signs are always there, some people just choose to ignore them out of “love” or hopes of “changing” the person. Like another person said, marriage is to be enjoyed and not tolerated.


#17

WORD


#18

I have a huge problem with images like this.

It’s all fun and games until he hits back!!!Women need to learn if you don’t want to be beat like a man,
DON’T HIT A MAN!!!

http://zegist.com:/uploads/default/original/2X/f/f35422491131038d9dd0047fa369a0b431fef1c0.mp4

cc @guccisleek @judy @emad @enigma @Bimz @Banks


#19

Why would a woman even hit a man in the first place? Hit a man?! Who does that? What happened to silent treatment? Or just walking away if u’re really pissed

Now back to d main topic of a man beating or hitting a woman.Uhn! It’s not a mistake oh and it’s not a sign of love either. The moment a man even thinks of it and gives the excuses of “she was nagging me,she was being rude,I was frustrated,I was angry and other flimsy excuses” then he has become a slave to that particular emotion (anger,frustration,etc)
There are so many ways to make a woman see that she’s wrong if u really want to prove that point to her. What happened to self control? Or just simply ignoring. Must u always win a battle? What happened to correcting with love. Ur wife is not ur slave, even a slave would eventually run away when maltreated.
I don’t see any excuse a man can give to defend himself. It’s completely wrong.

Ladies when our parents say marry ur best friend, they know what they’re saying. If u marry ur friend he will treat u right. He’ll see u as his partner,his buddie,so whatever u do won’t always be counted as a fault cos he’ll learn to accept that u’re not perfect and neither is he so why seek for surreal and irrelevant things.


#20

Hmmm… I guess that man and myself may share a little principle, I can proudly attest that I have not hit a woman or girl before & I choose to abide by such a principle, anyway that principle would have to be halted abruptly the day a lady would act so animalistically towards me as seen in the video above. :sunglasses: