My Husband Slept With My Friend


#1

This happened to someone I know.

Her husband has been cheating on her and each time she finds out, he begs, buys her stuffs and they continue their not so happy marriage.

The man is an Igbo business man and as such always traveling. He recently came back from one of his trips and days later while she was trying to send some pictures from his phone to hers, she noticed the recently deleted folder had lots of file. She got suspicious as her husband hadly deletes pictures and was curious to know what was there.

She opened it and behold, they were nude pictures and videos of her friend and husband. She immediately transferred all to her own phone and confronted her husband.

According to her, she suspected her husband was having an affair with the so-called friend but the husband denied that the friend was a ‘dirty smellos’ and can’t do anything with her.

The husband has been pleading with her since last week. She’s tired of the marriage but she already has 3 kids (boys) for this man.

What would you advice her to do? @evansakanno @Drew @Mira @Judy @darmie @ArahMAC @theunofficialomotayo @NaijaLander @W.O @Udy_Inyang @Echelon


#2

@Everybody please what do you advice her to do?

Assume you are in her shoes and tell us what you would do.


#3

Point 1

Point 2

So he will do it again…

I am out of the marriage… I wont rush out immediately but I will focus on taking care of the kids and minding my business till i decide whether to divorce him or not…

Women need to understand that they can’t allow men control their lives, their peace of mind, their mental state…


#4

So his reason for denying sleeping with her friend is because she’s a “ dirty smells and wouldn’t do anything with her “ ?

So if she wasn’t a dirty smellos?

Anyway she should leave …

He’s not about to stop anytime soon …

His apologies are clearly empty words because there’s no accountability and Change on his part

She’s not happy. Why is she forcing herself to stay where she’s not happy

Staying in this situation is not a good example to her kids …

She needs to leave … If she can’t leave immediately, she needs to work out an exit plan … She was not brought into this world to be someone’s dumpster …


#5

In every girl in the world, his wife friend? He clearly doesn’t respect her. How does he expect her to walk with pride as a married woman among her friends. In her shoes, I have pride, I can’t stay there and share husband with friends, I am off.


#6

she should leave…

plain and simple…

it i s not the first time and this is worse off because he did it with her friend… please no one is sacred to the man and he will always beg (truthfully)

she needs to grow and take care of herself and her kids need a safe environment to grown in…

she needs to beat up her friend though… Jheez… there are many men out there, why her friend’s hubby?


#7

What she should do?
She should forgive him again and make sure she satisfies him properly, maybe the friend has something she doesn’t have.
In fact she should invite the friend over for a three some, so she could teach her the styles she can use to satisfy her husband.
She shouldn’t cry oh, husband is scarce. As long as he still comes home and he still takes care of the kids, she has nothing to worry about.
She’s the main chick, the madam of the house, he still respects her by doing it outside. She alone cannot finish it sef, it’s not for her alone, it’s everybody’s property.
Very soon he would get tired of outside food and come back home.

Please nobody should tag me oh.


#8

yeah…
definitely not tagging you…


#9

Objection! :raising_hand_woman:t4:


#10

She’s scared of leaving, her parents are in Abeokuta and don’t have money.

Her husband is very wealthy and that’s why she’s been there all along. If she leaves with the kids, no money to take care of them.

My brother advised she goes to the office of the public defender.


#11

the truth is… it will be hard and probably get harder…

if she forgives him and it happens again, he may not beg after all, she has nowhere to go.
He may become abusive and still she has nowhere to go.

there are NGO’s for battered women and kids springing up everywhere now… she should be strong…
probably try the Public Defender sha…


#12

I don’t know mehn…I just don’t know.


#13

My dear @Chum_Sky, I would also object if I were you :grinning::grinning:


#14

When push comes to shove, she would know what to do.

Last time I checked spousal cheating is not a crime in Nigeria oh! The offense would be if there is intimate partner violence, or deprivation. Then she can go to human rights.

Even the public defender might be cheating on his wife with her sister and you expect him to support the woman?


#15

Come and take a big hug my dear. There is so much to say but no time to type now. Sense will not leave you, amen!


#16

From my findings, the office of the public defender here in Lagos is very active and they don’t joke with things like this.

I think her problem is just the money. She prefers to be with a cheating husband who gives her everything she wants.


#17

Amen oh! :hugs::hugs:
You can still come back to say those things sha.


#18

She doesn’t need advise. She needs to sit herself down and decide on what would work best for her.
She needs a wake up call. This is not a wake up call yet.
How can you have a rich husband and not have any business or money attached to your name? Like what the actual fuck? What if the man dies or throws her out of the house with the kids? No money to at least survive for 6 months.
All she needs is sense, not advise.


#19

agreeddd


#20

She can act like she has forgiven him… Start saving up off him to start something…

From there she can get something… and decide her next step