Well-Laid Plans

“How could you?” Helen screamed. “How could you ever do such a thing?”

Tom stared helplessly at his wife. He had committed adultery, faced his sinful actions, and asked his wife to forgive him.

“I never planned for an affair to happen,” Tom said with tears in his eyes.

Tom wasn’t lying. He knew he was making a few bad choices, but he hadn’t looked ahead at the consequences of his actions. After almost an hour of pleading, he said something that helped Helen begin to understand and eventually to forgive.

“I was unfaithful to you before I ever committed adultery.” He spoke of their being too busy to spend time together, his critical attitude, her lack of emotional response, her not listening to him when he talked about problems at the office.

That’s exactly how Satan works. He begins by bombarding our minds with cleverly devised patterns of irritation, dissatisfaction, doubts, fears, and reasonings. He moves slowly and cautiously (after all, well-laid plans take time).

Tom began to doubt that Helen truly loved him. She didn’t listen, and she didn’t always respond to his amorous moods.

One of his coworkers listened. One time she said, “Helen doesn’t deserve a warm, caring man like you.” (Satan also worked in her.) Each time Tom took a tiny step off the right path, he justified his actions in his mind: If Helen won’t listen to me, there are people who will.

The coworker listened. Weeks later, he hugged her and wished he could feel that caring response from his wife. It was a harmless embrace–or so it seemed.

Tom didn’t grasp that Satan is never in a hurry. All he needs is an opportunity to inject unholy, self-centered thoughts into our heads. If we don’t kick them out, they stay. And he can continue his evil, destructive plan.

We don’t have to allow those wrong thoughts to take residence in our heads. For the weapons of our warfare are . . . mighty before God. . . . [We] refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God; and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ . . . (2 Corinthians 10:4-5).

Lord Jesus, in Your name, I cry out for victory. Enable me to bring every thought into obedience. Help me not to allow Satan’s words to stay in my mind and steal my victory. Amen.

From the book Battlefield of the Mind Devotional by Joyce Meyer. Copyright © 2005 by Joyce Meyer. Published by FaithWords. All rights reserved.

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I have thought of this scenario a number of times when I discuss the importance of good clear communication between couples. But its not just about clear communication, we need God to help us all.

@Monique @Efe @Drew @NaijaLander @fola @Otumininu @theunofficialomotayo @W.O @Chum_Sky @Zoe @Tayo @Mira @Judy @Kiitan @evansakanno @Kachie @Yeye @Blessing @abnetz @Enigma @Udy_Inyang @Aniekan @Bobo @Roger @AdebsAlert @tunzi @oluwakemisola @LordMord @Lewikeezy @DUltimateWoman @The_Ugonna @KubasuInyanya @Nonso_Azike @lifeofesse @habeebsanni @ogeh47 @Alfred

What do you think?

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So true, and especially relevant today. Communication is key in every relationship, and its lack thereof can sow seeds of distrusts and misunderstandings.

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God should be the bedrock of every relationship because it actually takes grace to be able to sustain one.

One area where we really need grace is in the area of adequately meeting the needs of our spouses. Helen here didn’t use to listen when Tom had complains about work, and it made it seem like she wasn’t caring enough. When you deprive your spouse of something, the devil will ensure they get it outside. That is usually his handwork.

May God help us.

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Communication is great, so is a well laid out family plan. Most people design business plans, write vision and mission statements all because they want a successful business. Almost no one ever writes a family plan before and after they enter into a marriage.

The earlier people realize that these plans written out in black and white, printed and hung in strategic places serve as pivots/blueprints to which they can always go back to when things get rough, the better.

The devil has a plan for every marriage, why shouldn’t couples have a plan for their marriage.

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YEAH… We need God… Sometimes, it is really not about communication. Communication helps to know the problem, but is it every time both parties are willing to solve the problem or talk through it?

Yesterday I met a lady who was looking to rent an apartment and I wondered why so she told her story.

“She married the love of her life, She earns more than him which was fine cos he is her love. Love conquereth all things…
Along the way he loses his job, she had to start taking care of the responsibilities. She also had “her best friend” living in her house who had issues and she was helping out” Oga start “business” with the best friend" It was her 5 yr old innocent daughter that told her what happens when she is not home" she felt it was just a child story till she caught them in the act" In conclusion, They are divorced now"

Like I don’t know what the cause of the issue could have been? Would you say she got too busy fending for the family that she couldn’t meet his needs? Would you say they spoke about it and didn’t find a solution?

Communication is a step to solving an issue but It is not all who HEARS that LISTENS and act.

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Absolutely, God has to be number one (especially for believers) in marriage. Closely followed should be communication (not ordinary communication, i mean serious one), so serious that if as a husband, you feel that you’re almost cheating, you should have developed a good communicative relationship with your wife, so much so that you can tell her what is going on.
I like to watch series that center on business and politics and one thing i noticed about the lead characters (mostly the villians) is their ability to communicate everything with their partner . Check ‘house of cards’ and ‘billions’ for illustrations

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I love this statement because now i think about it, it is true. Satan sits down with a bottle of fanta and popcorn and designs the path for you.
Relationships of any kind take work and two willing hearts… you must be willing to be vulnerable and trust your partner to carry you…

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Aaaaaw Tayo!! You really deserve lots of hugs for this @theunofficialomotayo.

I have always said it…communication and understanding are the bed rock of every relationship. Are you communicating properly? Is the person understanding all you’re communicating?

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Very key, Is the person you are communicating with understanding that communication. Communication is a two way thing, if the other person does not understand, then there has been NO communication.

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Wisdom undiluted
Saving this for the future

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Communication is important.

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Was in a bad mood dealing with an issue relating to communication… I was damn annoyed I was expressing my self and somebody is just there giving me those painful and usual one line answers “I will work on it”.

Decided to laugh small from comments and then saw the tag from the igwe to read this post turn message.

Thank you for this insights.
@evansakanno @theunofficialomotayo

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I will start another post about “Words Left Unsaid”. A lot of relationships are dying daily because people decide to say I love you in their heart and say I’m fine when in reality they are dying inside.

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I am a very strange selective person. I tend to pick things like the look and structure of a girl’s feet, toes, fingers, legs, forehead, and teeth etc before i pick up a conversation. That i dont need God for. I have also come to understand that women talk alot. They like their man who talks but not more than them.

I am not the type to start a conversation. all my ex’s know. so guys here’s an advice on how to keep up with communications with your partner. Whatever my ex’s say…i always keep the conversation going with short words like — eeh eeeeh!! :sunglasses:, tell me something :relaxed:, really, come’on :roll_eyes:, thats a lie, node of the head and wrinkle of the lips :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:etc… TRUST ME… it works.

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You will be touching hearts that way

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:joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy: This reminds me of my former dramatic self… We “girls” never say what is wrong… Everytime … “Nothing” “It’s fine” …

But now Aint nobody gat time… I tell you as it is… I can do a 3hr call telling the story or give full script depending on how he wants…
Really … It is best people just speak up. It saves a lot of headache , drama and stress.

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YESS OOO

This is part of mental awareness!

I agree… I hope to be the kind of wife whose husband can be open enough to tell me … Babe, I’m slipping … Then we figure out how to fix it together …

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My dear, that is goals

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